A real woman is a man's best friend. She will never stand him up and

never let him down. She will reassure him when he feels insecure and

comfort him after a bad day.

She will inspire him to do things he never thought he could do; to live

without fear and regret. She will enable him to express his

deepest emotions and give in to his most intimate desires.

She will make sure he always feels as though he's the most handsome man

in the room and will enable him to be confident, sexy, seductive and

invincible. . .

No wait... shit, I’m sorry... I'm thinking of beer.

That's what beer does...

Never mind.