An excellent synopsis, thank you.
I'll spare you the detailed timeline that got us through the process, but in my little world we will be having our joint kickoff meeting a full sixteen months after initial talks had taken place AFTER decisions were made to make an offer on this company. These are two companies that know each other VERY well so add at least six months to the process for negotiations to take place between companies that DO NOT know each other.
Funding restrictions play a not insignificant part, closure happens much faster with $100m available opposed to $20m. Also, potential candidates will grow in number pro rata to increses in available funding.
What you seem to be missing here is that there is a whole feeling out process that needs to take place so one side or the other does not feel like they are leaving money on the table. Companies of real value are typically not "listed" or "on the market" so to go shopping for a technology company - even if you are well connected in the industry - would be like driving into neighborhood, picking a nice house and knocking on the door and saying you would like to buy the place.
Nice analogy, which made me smile, having done that myself. Independent valuation helps speed the process.
One alternative to either a merger or acquisition might be to follow in S&L's footsteps with seed funding of several viable companies.
Be well