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Message: Will It Come To This?

Moo
May 27, 2008 01:39PM




While considering the future of airline travel in the post apocalyptic, $125 dollar-a-barrel oil future, we thought it might be helpful to ponder how airlines might reduce costs and increase revenues for the oil scarce future. While we were gnawing on this particular bone we derived the following list of the good, the bad, and the ugly for your consideration. Perhaps you have had similar thoughts - shame on you!

Pay-for-use lavatories - This idea had some merit but the problem of payment collection has us confounded. While electronic bill sensors and credit card readers might be needed they would just add weight... not to mention the possibility of those bus driver change thingies that dispense coins that the flight attendants would need to wear. After all, anyone who has traveled to the British Isles should be used to paying for the loo!

The Forever Stamp concept - For those of you who are not familiar with the US Post Office, there is a postage stamp available here that users can buy and be guaranteed - regardless of current rate - payment for a first class mailed letter. For the airlines users would buy a ticket to a destination and it would be good forever for flight on the issued route. A premium is paid for the ticket but the user is assured that they can fly whenever.

Carry-On Air - Yes, you guessed it, an all carry-on airline with virtually no reasonable baggage availability is the beauty of this idea. Not only would the airline be assured of a consistent cargo space availability, they would not have all the mess, cost and confusion of baggage. The cool part about this idea is the fact that you are almost guaranteed not to be seated by a "howler" on your next flight. The "bag bin rage" problem is another issue!

Pay-For-Play IFE. OK, this is a dumb idea not only because this is an In-Flight Entertainment publication, but because it is a difficult policy to implement and hard to collect payment: bottom line - it is bound to infuriate passengers. Increasing fuel costs may, like food, force travelers to bring their own. We think the prepaid surcharge is a better approach - you have to pay it to board and airlines could call it the entertainment surcharge and base it on the need to pay the stars more money and recoup the gains of the writers strike. Hey, George Clooney needs a new pool!

The Gas Gauge-In-The Cabin concept. This idea came about because of a need to provide passenger awareness of the fuel issue. Oops, bad idea, a low fuel gauge would only generate angst among passengers. Better to place a "This Flight's Fuel Costs $____" in the cabin. Hey, its better than passing the hat.....

LLastly, and the worst of the bunch, the "Go-Before-You-Go" campaign. Suffice it to say it is a weight reduction campaign and... oh, you get the idea.


May 28, 2008 02:50AM
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