Near Fredericksburg, Texas, where there is a large German-speaking population, a farmer walking down a country road notices a man drinking from his pond with his hand.

The farmer shouted: 'Trink das wasser nicht. Die kuhen haben dahin gesheissen.' (Which means: 'Don't drink the water, the cows have pooped in it.'

The man shouted back: 'I'm from New York and just down here campaigning for Obama, I can't understand you. Please speak in English.'

The farmer replied: 'Use two hands, you'll get more.