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Message: New American Every 14 Seconds .....

They tell me Cheetah is now living in a cave - has a new club too - a wooden one with spikes on it - to defend himself against irrate females. Rumour has it he wants to get a patent on it to raise his dramatically lowered income. Nobody wants to sponsor him! Nobody can stand the stench in his cave - really vile. No T.V. cameras either - just a wood fire. Really sad.

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