Always have a back up plan
posted on
Jun 29, 2011 06:56PM
So this guy walks out of his house bright and early for work. Hearing a noise behind him, he turns quickly and spots a gorilla on his roof. Rushing back into the house, he calls the police. The police tell him they don't do gorillas and he should call the gorilla guy.
After searching the yellow pages, he selects one from the extensive list of gorilla guys and calls him. The gorilla guy says he'll be right over. The occupant goes outside to await the gorilla guy. Shortly, a white panel truck careens around the corner and pulls up in front of the house. The guy jumps out of the truck and goes to the rear doors. He takes out a ladder, a long pole, a net, a pair of handcuffs, a German Shepherd and an S&W 357 Magnum.
The occupant is confused and asks the gorilla guy what he's going to do. The gorilla guy tells him that he is going to need his help. The occupant is a little scared but agrees to help.
The gorilla guy says, " I'm going to climb on the roof with this long pole. Then I'll push the gorilla off the roof. Here's where you come in," says the gorilla guy. " The moment the gorilla hits the ground, you release the German Shepherd. The dog has been trained to attack the gorilla's package. The gorilla will do what any self respecting gorilla does in that situation. He will cover his crotch with his hands." Yeah, yeah, what happens next," asks the occupant? I think we can all agree that, by this time, the occupant is really gittin' into it. But I digress.
The gorrilla guy continues. "When the gorilla covers his jewels, you slap the handcuffs on him and throw the net over him. We'll have that sucker immobilized". "Great, exclaims the occupant but what's the 357 Magnum for."
"Well", says the gorilla guy, "sometimes the gorilla pushes me off the roof. If that happens, shoot that damn dog."